The Mystery
"Ask all you want. We're not telling. The rest is just men doing stuff we write songs about."
Note: Puppet anonymity is protected. We reserve the right to deny everything, including this sentence.
RITA
The blonde. The margarita. The one who's seen too much.
TINI
The brunette. The dirty martini. The one who tells it like it is.
Who We Are
"We're Rita and Tini. That's all you need to know."
Frequently Asked Questions
Answered with the patience we don't have.
Q:Who are the puppeteers?
A: Irrelevant. Next question.
Q:Is this show for kids?
A: Only if you want to traumatize them and have some very awkward conversations afterwards.
Q:Can we get a picture with you?
A: With us? Always. We're gorgeous. With 'them'? Never. They don't exist.
Q:Are your songs based on real experiences?
A: Every song is fiction. Any resemblance to your ex-boyfriend is purely coincidental. (It's about him.)
Q:Do you do private events?
A: Depends. Is there an open bar? Is your uncle going to try to debate us? Important questions.
Q:Where can I find you on social media?
A: We're on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Our puppeteers are on LinkedIn, but that's not relevant to you.
Q:Why a puppet show for adults?
A: Because someone had to say what everyone's thinking, and puppets can't get cancelled.
This space intentionally left mysterious.
(Just like our backstory)